What if rather than an end goal, it was about maximising your experience of life each day and seeing where it takes you?
I am not healed. I’m really not. And I’m coming round to the idea that maybe that’s not the goal anymore…
I still experience symptoms day to day, I still have times that I really struggle, I still have moments of helplessness, frustration, fighting. I’m imperfect, I’m finding my way through, experimenting as I go, learning and developing.
Everything out there tells us that’s not okay. You’re either healed, or sick. You’re either the coach on instagram that’s solved it all, is fully healed, or you’re not valid. It’s a black and white destination to be reached. And I haven’t reached it.
But what if it isn’t? Who do you truly know personally that is ‘healed’ completely in all areas of their life? Does it really exist? Or are we all on a journey of ebbs and flows, continuous self-improvement & resilience building? What if rather than a black and white destination, it was about maximising your experience of life each day and seeing where it takes you?
I think all chronic illness sufferers have fight in their hearts that resists this (me included). It's that drive, that resilience, that passion that makes us special and will support us on on our healing journeys.
Is focusing on this end goal of being 'healed' helpful?
Or does it put you into a threat state? A sense of danger in where you are, and the situation you're in? A feeling you can't be safe and okay until you're 'healed’.
What if the focus wasn't on the end goal anymore? What if you let go of comparing yourself to 'healed' people on instagram? What if you let go of the heavy expectation? What if it was okay to be a work in progress, forever? How would that feel?
I feel a huge sense of relief, ease and calmness in my nervous system when I sense that I don't need to keep reaching, that no one is 'healed' and it's the continued healing and learning is okay.
Laying a new brick every day in whatever way I can is my power. And sharing all my learnings is my gift. These are statements I have to repeat to myself over and over again.
And finally, just remember you're doing incredible right now, wherever you are at. Just to be here, continuing to invest in yourself shows the resilience you have inside you. That is what matters. That is all you can control.
Sending lots of healing love,
James